Lord of the Alchemists

A Lord of the Rings and Fullmetal Alchemist Crossover Fanfiction

DISCLAIMER: I don’t own Lord of the Rings, nor do I own Fullmetal Alchemist. And then there were some.

Note: I have all three movies of Lord of the Rings, and yet I never paid attention to them while watching. I know them just well enough to know everyone's names, the plot and sorts. The reason I’m writing this fic is that we read The Hobbit at school, and I kinda liked it. Oh yeah, I’m also adding another group of bad guys that are mentioned near the end.

Episode I, Part 2

Trolls and Goblins…That’s SO Freakish

“Eh, no.” Edward scratched the back of his head. “I can explain…” Suddenly, the ground started shaking, and everyone heard marching off in the distance.

“Trolls and goblins!” Gandalf yelled. The Fellowship scrambled, while Edward and Alphonse stood there, looking around, and wondering what was going on.

“Run, Lad, run!” Sam called.

“Um…okay?” Ed just nodded, and he and his brother ran off to wherever the others went. Ed and Al his behind some bushes with the hobbits, and watched a few armies of ugly looking creatures march past them. Edward shivered at the freaky looking faces, and wondered what would happen if he had to go face to face with one of those creatures. A long piece of grass tickled his nose.

“Ah…Ah…” he gasped. Ed shut his eyes and covered his nose and mouth. The sneezing feeling wouldn’t go away. “ah…AHHH-CHOO!!” The marching of the trolls and goblins quickly stopped, as all of their heads turned to the bush where Ed, Al, and the hobbits were hiding.

“Ah, shoo—oot,” Edward whined.

“Run!” Frodo ordered. Alphonse quickly grabbed Ed, and started running, the hobbits following quickly behind. And, well, so were the trolls.

“Where are the others!?” Edward asked. Frodo shrugged, still running.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Pippin!” Merry gasped for breath. “I…I can’t go on much longer!”

“Keep running, Merry!” Pippin yelled. Merry tripped, and fell. A troll stopped, and raised his weapon to attack the defenseless hobbit. The troll suddenly screamed in pain, as Edward sliced at his face with the little sword weapon thing on his automail arm. The other trolls charged at the teen, yelling at the top of their lungs. Aragorn fell from a tree above, attacking on of the creatures. Gimli gruffed, and snuffed, attacking anyone who got five feet near his beard. Legolas stood, attacking with his arrows. Gandalf just used magic, the lucky wizard. Nearly one fourth of the troll army was defeated, when they all retreated. The goblins didn’t really bother with them.

The Fellowship sat on the ground, catching their breaths from the battle. Edward’s sword thing had disappeared, and Al was helping Merry out of the shock of almost dying.

“These woods are dangerous, we must be more careful,” Legolas said. The others nodded in agreement.

“Anyhow, we better get back to camp,” Frodo announced.

That night…

“So, Edward, tell us about your travels,” Aragorn said. Ed scratched his head in thought.

“Well…there was this one time when we were at a desert town, and there was this guy called Cornello who said he could perform ‘miracles’,” Edward put his hands up in quotes. “but then he was found out to be a fraud and we took care of him! Right, Al?” Alphonse nodded in response.

“Hm, very interesting…” Gandalf said.

“I think we should rest up and leave first thing tomorrow!” Gimli stood up.

“Yes, we should be well rested for the journey ahead.” Frodo said.

“What are we going to do now, Brother?” Alphonse asked, sitting in the tent. “should we really put the journey to find the Philosopher’s Stone on hold and help these guys out?”

“Yeah. Helping these guys might give us clues to finding the stone,” Edward turned over in the blankets, and shut his eyes to get to sleep.

That morning…

Edward walked out of his tent and stretched his arms above his head, yawning really loud.

“Have a good night’s sleep, Lad?” Sam asked, eating one of those Elfish biscuits (I think that’s what they are).

“Yeah! I thought I would never have been able to sleep!” Ed grinned, showing off his sparkling clean teeth that I think Armstrong would have been proud to see (sparkle sparkle).

“Good for you, Shorty! Now we don’t have to worry about others being tired!” Legolas placed his hand on the young man’s head.

“SHORTY!?” Edward yelled. He was just about ready to lunge at the Elf, but was held back by Al. “I’LL SHOW YOU SHORT!!! (Ed! Control yourself!) WHEN I’M DONE WITH YOU, (Aah! Brother, take control!) YOU WILL NEVER HAVE THE RIGHT TO CALL ME SHORT!!!” Ed had his arms reach out as far as he could, growling like he’s never done before. Steam came out of his ears when he thought he heard someone say “What a bean.”

“Let’s go now, shall we?” Gandalf chuckled.

The group started walking, began to cool off, his face not as red as it was.

“Would you like a biscuit?” Merry asked, handing him a piece of bread.

“Oh, yeah. Thanks.” Edward smiled. He looked over at Al. “it’s a bummer you can’t eat or drink, Bro.”

“Oh, that’s all right. I will be able to soon,” Alphonse said.

“Our mom died of an illness when Al and I were 9 and 10,” Edward said to the group when Frodo asked him about his parents. “and our dad ditched us when we were very little, we don’t even remember his face.”

“How tragic…” Aragorn sighed.

“Our friend, Winry, her parents died in a war by a surprise attack,” Ed continued, his mind trailing off about the forbidden ritual he and his brother performed five years ago. It was a…truly horrid nightmare.

“Say, Al,” Pippin looked over at the walking suit. “why are you…empty?” Edward winced at the thought being asked.

“Oh…well, after our mom died, we paid to get trained by a teacher for alchemy, starting from scratch,” Al explained.

“Then, we got all of the ingredients for the average adult human body, and put it all in a large pot,” Ed said.

“And then we put our hands in the Transmutation Circle, and after a few seconds, I was being dragged into this large door by these little hand like things…but that’s all I remembered…”

“My leg was eaten away, and I saw something, where the pot was, something that I thought was Mother, but was something that wasn’t human…” Ed clenched his teeth. “I got over to the large suit of armor in the corner of the room, and I drew a snake-cross (like thing) on the shoulder part. I lost my right arm to get Al’s soul sealed into the armor.” Ed finally ended. “and now we’re searching for something to get our bodies back to normal again!” he grinned.

“Ah, that’s the story…” Gandalf said. “I thought you were in league with THEM.”

“Who?” Alphonse and Edward asked.

“There’s a group of creatures who roam the country, destroying countless villages. They, too, have body parts like you.” The wizard answered.

“We’ve run into them before,” Legolas said. “but we get away before they can spot us.” (that doesn’t really make sense O_o)

“Hm…seems like there’s a lot more to this journey than we thought, Al,” Edward said to his brother. Alphonse nodded in response.

And so, the Elric Brothers start a new journey, not only to find more clues to the Philosopher’s Stone, but also to help the Fellowship destroy the bad guys! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Edward: Aw, geez. How many sugar cubes has she had this time?